have you ever heard that expression that death comes in 3's and 7's? i think i heard it the first time on a grey's anatomy episode. but lately, the superstitious bone in my body is starting to make me believe it's true. so many people i know have been affected by a death recently and it really hurts my heart. death is such a sad, sad thing that everyone has had to deal with in some way. but it never gets any easier to deal with when it happens. at one point in my life, the whole concept of death was really hard for me to wrap my mind around. when i said earlier in the blog that i get lost in my own mind, i wasn't kidding. there have been extreme times where i've even struggled to know what reality was, much less the thought of someone that used to be in my reality that will never be again. what is your reality? what separates your reality from your dreams? and where does death fit into all this? because, i mean, i know it's entirely illogical to believe that everything we experience is a dream. but didn't inception get to any of yall? (ha just kidding.. sort of) i know at the lowest points in my life were the times when i had the most vivid and realistic nightmares/terrors. and that's only one definition of the word 'dream'. my other dream is to become a doctor of psychology and there's absolutely nothing stopping me from making that dream a reality, right?
i know i'm starting to sound a bit insane and overly existential, so i better stop before i go all Faulkner and start writing in complete stream of consciousness.
i love this song right now.
i'm sure you've all heard foster the people by now because i learned from twitter that they played on the VMAs? this specific song, waste, was playing in the background in my car the other day and the chorus caught my attention in a big way.
and every day that you want to waste, that you want to waste, you can
and every day that you want to wake up, that you want to wake, you can
and every day that you want to change, that you want to change, yeah
if you want to read the lyrics in their entirety, you can here. this chorus just keeps bolstering my (Buddha's) thoughts that whatever you think, you become. i wanted to wake up this morning and go to work, so i did. i have this breath and this heart that keeps beating and this day to do whatever it is that i want to do. and i'm so lucky and grateful to have realized this. my hope is that everyone i love spends their days doing exactly what they want to do.
another great weekend for the books. i love my friends. and i love that my friends share my semi unhealthy obsession with my morning jacket. i still have a sharp pain near my collar bone that i decided came from laughing so much this weekend, because every time i laugh is when it hurts.
i realized something about myself this weekend: when i really like something, i tend to become obsessed with it. a few examples are the color green, mary-kate olsen, rufus, my morning jacket, emoticons, abnormal psychology. i'm not sure if it's a good or bad thing. i'm just going to count it as a positive because it shows that i'm a passionate person, right?
pinterest makes me want an entire new wardrobe for fall, unnecessarily. (pinterest is another one of those recent obsessions) however, i feel like this green pea coat i have my eye on may very well become a necessity. i love fall so much! its my favorite season. it also includes my birthday, which is 29 days from today. and i'm always exceptionally excited around september 20th ± 1 month.
i feel like i need to call jim james "his majesty" when i look at this photo.
lots of things happening recently. i feel like i'm living life very fast.
here's some semi vague updates:
i made my moving situation super complicated and stressed myself out so right now i'm technically homeless with no physical address. luckily, i have the most understanding and best friends a girl could ask for and all areas of that situation have been placated.
some of my relationships have changed in the most mature way possible.
took the gre and did better than last time.. stillll not good enough though. i will get the score i need in october. i will.
nashville has become a little soft spot in my heart. i've been spending a lot of time there lately and i just love it. i keep going back and forth with nashville and chicago. the uncertainty of where i'll be next year is scary + exciting.
i got new glasses from see! they're green. i love the color green.
do yourself a favor and go ahead and jump on the pinterest wagon. if you need an invite, ask!
rufus has been extreeeemely busy himself.
here's his new workout routine... boxing, the pendulum swing, downward dog, etc..
my bebe sister moves in to her dorm this weekend!!!!! how exciting is that. i can't wait for her to love ut as much as i did. i wish i could go back to the beginning of college.. knowing everything i know now. ha.
..... also... does somebody want to buy me this ring?
